My mom sends me weekly articles written by a man named Dr. Davidicus Wong. She found his articles on the internet and since then has forwarded them onto me and my sister every week. His articles talk about different life lessons, as well as sharing his experiences/thoughts on keeping a healthy life, making life meaningful, how to nurture positive relationships, some ways to deal with emotional problems, and how to overall appreciate life each day. I find his writings very inspiring, and they definitely are one of the things I use to remind myself what is important in life, and how to make it meaningful for myself, as well as others -- in a positive way. I share them with you in hopes maybe a few of you might also enjoy reading them. I'll do my best to post them each week, and I'll try to post older ones too if I can. All credits and ownership go to Dr. Davidicus Wong. I do not take any credits or ownership for what he has written, I am just sharing it. ^.

Note about this article: This article by Dr. Davidicus Wong is centered around parenting and relationships. While only a few of us might be parents, or even old enough to consider ourselves adults, the article does talk about the importance of relationships in a general sense. He talks about how any good relationship really depends on things like trust, being able to deal with emotion, allowing other people to grow, learn, be tolerant, accepting, as well as learning to do the same for yourself. Enjoy.

~ TNaismith

Parenting brings chance for spiritual growth

Dr. Davidicus Wong Wednesday, March 24, 2010

The greatest of spiritual exercises will challenge and transform your sense of self, force you to confront your own demons, your fallibility and your mortality and take you through the spectrum of human emotion from exultation to heartbreak. If you survive, you will have learned to love and be loved, and you will have passed that legacy to another.
To be a parent requires humility. That humility allows you to be both teacher and student. You learn from your child, from your evolving relationship and from the insights and emotions your child evokes in you.

The birth of my first child was a transformative experience. My identity and purpose in life instantly changed. I had become a father and my purpose was to devote my life to this precious dependent life in my arms. My own self-interests had become secondary.

The greatest training in mindfulness is to share the presence of a young child. The cynicism of young adulthood gives way to a renewed sense of wonder in the world. By showing and sharing with that child, we are drawn into their focus on the present. A day at the beach, a walk in the park, and an hour in the playground are experiential gifts to both parent and child. Those eternal moments may become foundational memories to the child as they are treasured by the parent.

As my children have grown and grown out of complete dependence, playgrounds and toys, I appreciate all the more the temporality of each stage of growth. This has helped me endure the tantrums of the terrible twos, the energy and dependence of young children, and the emotional amplitudes of adolescence. And it has taught me to enjoy the gifts that my children are at each stage of their lives. They are always changing, so we must endure patiently and enjoy presently.

One of our roles as parents is to teach emotional awareness and control. We can do this by coaching our young children to identify the feelings of the moment and helping them understand their origin and how they may express them in appropriate ways. We also teach less consciously by our own emotional responses and actions. In fact, our behaviour sets the tone of our homes.

Though we are the parents, we continue to learn and grow as we are challenged by our children and deal with our own stages of life.

Our children can serve as our mirrors. They have always been a reflection of their genetic heritage; when they are teens and young adults, they can be parodies of us. Their obsessions and faults can be our own.

When your child's behaviour triggers an emotional reaction in you, ask what you are really responding to. Are you reacting to your child in the present, or some issue in your past or in yourself that remains unresolved?

Acceptance of your child is a step towards self-acceptance and a resolution of our deepest interpersonal conflicts. They can teach us to laugh at ourselves, to forgive ourselves as we forgive them, and to accept ourselves as we accept them. They can teach us to love ourselves, our whole selves, including the self reflected in them.